Be yourself. Be confident in your capabilities. The reward is that you get what you want.
Sounds cheesy, but it’s true. People respond positively to those who act with confidence.
Whether you want to get a first date with someone, get a promotion, or take your business to the next level, boosting your confidence is a great way to accomplish it. Here’s why:
What Confidence Really Means
Have you ever met someone who seems to have everything under control? They’re smooth-talking, making statements rather than asking questions, standing tall, have a firm handshake, and have an air of confidence? They seem to be successful, don’t they? All appearances suggest that they’re in control and living the life they want. Confidence is what makes them look this way. Confidence sends a powerful signal to everyone who sees it. It says “I consider myself to be a success”.
Confidence tells other people that you possibly a good life long partner, a worthy competitor, a capable leader. It doesn’t matter how a person is dressed, whether or not they’re physically attractive because if they are confident the assumption on your part is they must have a reason to be that confident. Which leads you to believe they know something that you don’t.
This is when we make assumptions about people with confidence: that they are somehow superior or at a higher level than we are and that we should try to impress them or work to be more like them. That’s why we gravitate toward confident people, want to date them and want to be liked by them.
Many people don’t understand the importance of confidence versus just being nice. While being kind and nice to others is a good thing, doing so while trying to get what you want and not having confidence can be perceived by others as being fake or sometimes creepy. And, that’s because you seem needy and that’s not what you want to do.
If you act less needy and more like you are capable and then you start a conversation in a friendly and open way, people will perceive you as confident and charming. This is because your confidence makes the niceness seem more genuine.
So, take your niceness a level higher by adding a bit of confidence. As an employee, this means stop being self-deprecating and give an honest assessment of your abilities and skills. As a man trying to get a date with a woman, stop being cocky or shy and simply be friendly and kind as you strike up a conversation that will lead to asking her for a date.
Act as if you know you are capable and add a layer of nice on top. Now you have a winning recipe for getting what you want in life.